introversion and college

As I mentioned the other day, I’m an introvert and I love being alone. I am also a university student. These two things don’t always mesh together cohesively.

The difficulties with being an introvert in college were more prominent during my freshman year. As is the nature of university, who don’t know a lot of people, you’re in a new environment, and you just want to fit in. So what do you do? Go to social gatherings of some sort. For some it’s going to parties, for me it was joining too many clubs and being a part of a large friend group.

Most of my friends during my time in university have been extroverts. Being that they’re extroverts, they recharge their energy by being around people. Being that I am an introvert who recharges by spending time by myself, those two concepts don’t marry well.

I had to learn the hard way that an introvert can not train themself to be an extrovert. You can try, you can pull it off for a while, but eventually your body and mind will burnout and you’ll have to return to your natural tendencies. Being an introvert surrounded by extroverted friends, I had to learn how to get over my fear of missing out for the sake of my mental well-being.

My extroverted friends seem to have energy for days. They could talk about anything’s ms everything and do loads of affinities for hours on end. Eventually, my social battery gets drained and I’ll need to bid everyone farewell — but that was when my FOMO would scream out “No! What if you miss something monumental?” Because of that anxiety, I would force myself to remain in social situations long after my brain was begging for me to have already left. After staying in social situations long after I was drained on more occasions than I can count, I eventually realized that I need to stop doing that.

It’s taken me a while, but now I do my best to recognize when my social battery is empty and gracefully remove myself from a social situation. The most important thing to remember as n introvert in college is that it’s okay to take time to yourself. You don’t need to try to train yourself to be more sociable than what your social battery can take. Certainly get out of your comfort zone and make friends, but make time for yourself, too.